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Mary Schmidt Archives - All The Single Girlfriends

The Power (and Fun) of Single

Feb 27, 2012 by

Society is beginning to realize something us long-time, extremely single people have known all along. It’s fun to be single. And, I’m not talking single bars and all-night parties.  Although I do admit, I had a really, really, really  good time in my younger days. I could never run for public office. ‘nuf said. Thank GOD they didn’t have Facebook back then. Although it would have been nice to have voice mail; I might not have wasted all those hours hanging around all casual, waiting for a guy to call…(Remember? Oh, I know you did it too.  And sometimes you picked up the phone to make sure it had dial tone.)  But I digress… ANYWAY, single has become legit! We’re no longer those poor, sad people who droop home to dusty little apartments to...

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The Hardest Part of Changing the World...

Feb 13, 2012 by

I had a post almost finished.  All about how for (less than) 40 cents a day you could help save at least a small part of the world.  Our big “ask” for our readers (and my fellow atsgfers) to step up and help us help others.  But…you’ve heard it all before, haven’t you?  If not from me, from about a thousand other worthy causes. (I’ve been writing about our Adopt A Village project for several weeks here, on my blog and on Lipsticking.)  Then, I talked to Leslie Kahihikolo of GHNI and scrapped the post. Started over.  I asked Leslie why she got involved with GHNI.  Long story short, because the people touched her heart.  She saw up close what GHNI does.  Met the people behind the pleas. Got her hands (literally) dirty. (That’s her,...

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What Can I Do? I Only Have So Much Money!...

Feb 6, 2012 by

Some quick math for the ATSGF Adopt-A-Village project: $12/month X 12 divided by 365 = 39.5 cents Over the past – um – three decades or so, I’ve blown a lot of money, on good things and bad. When working in corporate America, I tried to buy my way to happiness($65 for a make-up brush? No prob! I didn’t even look at price tags. Gulp…) My mid-life crises always seemed to involve some combination of men and new cars. (Oh Ah! A convertible!) Then there were the biz deals that didn’t work out (I’ve been worth a million or two, a time or two…on paper. Good thing I didn’t run out and spend it.) I could easily have several hundred grand in the bank (I don’t)…but ah well, I did have some good times....

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Saving the World Is Boring.

Jan 30, 2012 by

Following on my post from last week, We ALL Need A Village. Tedious. Overwhelming. Numbing.   And oh-so-terribly depressing…However, we have to start somewhere…or there’ll be no “where” to save one of these days. That’s why I’m working on the Adopt A Village project with Global Hope Network International. Yeah. You’ve heard it all before, all over the place. (How many pleas did you pitch in the recycle bin this month, unopened?  My count is at least 10.)  So why am I continuing to write about this? Here’s why: Empathy. Forget the videos, photos, and heartfelt pleas for a second. (Not to worry. No sad photos of starving kids are in this blog post.) Let’s face it, we’ve all pretty much become numb to the woes of the world. EVERYTHING has become an outrage.  Oh-hum. (If we...

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We ALL Need a Village.

Jan 23, 2012 by

…Virtual, real, or some combination thereof.  We extremely single women have “villages” of friends who may or may not live close, but are always there for us when needed.  These villages become even more important as we age. (I LOVE living alone, but what happens if I fall and really can’t get up? No joke or punch line there.) Despite what some of us would like to think, nobody survives, much less thrives, totally alone.  We need our villages. But what happens if the village itself needs help? Last fall, in my ongoing qwest for community (and how to help communities), I attended SOBCon Northwest in Portland. Its entire theme was about how to give back, help…do well by doing good.  I learned a lot, laughed even more (yes, martinis were involved), and came...

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In Defense of Butter (and Paula Deen)...

Jan 20, 2012 by

“If you’re afraid of butter, use cream.” ― Julia Child I know Ms. Deen is more than capable of taking care of herself (She told Anthony Bourdain to “get a life.”) Excellent response to his attention-seeking taunts about her dangerous irresponsibility and “disgusting” food. Like he NEVER cooked with butter?  Or ate something that looked totally disgusting (baby bird eaten whole, including guts and feet, anyone?)  However, she’s really been taking some major hits lately…hits that are often mean, petty, and just downright wrong. As for butter (and fat) – our bodies love it  and need it. Our mouths crave that “fat feel.” When we don’t get it, we stay hungry and keep eating. “Low-fat” can actually cause you to gain weight.  From WebMD: The problem is that sometimes “fat free” is also, well, taste...

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No, I Don’t Want A Salad

Jan 13, 2012 by

“We’ll be having prime rib; if you don’t want to eat that, there’ll be salad and stuff…since there’ll only be two of you who don’t eat meat.” – a friend inviting me to a New Year’s feast. Oh! Boy! I could hardly wait to go feast on “salad and stuff.” This week’s lead article in the NYT dining section was Meatless in the Midwest: A Tale of Survival. It’s the story of an NYT reporter who moved to Kansas City, Mo and is a hard-core vegetarian (I’m not). However, I can really relate to her being told by a waitress – after working the way through menu options (made with lard, made with chicken stock, etc.) – “You want a salad.”  Well, no she really didn’t. But that’s what she got, and iceberg.  Sigh....

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A Good Goodbye (or How To Die Well) By Gail Rubin...

Dec 20, 2011 by

Gail Rubin decided to write a book.  And, it wasn’t just any book.  It was about death.  How to plan for it, deal with it, and – most importantly – think about it.  When we met for coffee, she started by saying, “Talking (thinking) about death won’t kill you, just as talking about sex won’t make your pregnant.”  Hey, I like this woman.  Smart and a touch irreverent! Gail is also a breast cancer survivor, so she’s been up close and personal with her own mortality.  As she notes in the book’s introduction, “Facing the thought of our death can help to better appreciate the reality of life.” Her book, A Good Goodbye, Funeral Planning for Those Who Don’t Plan to Die, is a well-written, common sense guide to how to deal with death,...

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Are You Authentic … Or Lost In (Following) The Crowd?...

Dec 12, 2011 by

I love old, retro authentic “stuff.” Rusted boxes? Ancient baskets? Yep, love ‘em (in moderation, I should note). One of my favorite garage sale finds wass a circuit breaker box with a fine “patina” (read rust) – polished up beautifully.  A friend found my truly vintage (company has been defunct for decades) steel and brass file cabinet on a street corner; it polished up nicely too. A small chair my uncle made some 70-odd years ago in shop sits next to my sofa, holding books. (I remember it sitting in my grandmother’s bathroom [? Go figure] for years). My solid wood swivel desk armchair (In which I’m sitting as a I type this on my slick-lookin’ iMac) was a $12 steal at Salvation Army. I hang framed postcards next to expensive art. I collect...

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Happy and Sad All at the Same Time...

Dec 5, 2011 by

Recently a friend posted this on her Facebook status: “this week has been incredible so far as ups and downs emotionally. tonight, my husband took me to Lancaster for an incredible dinner and conversation. it was marvelous. on the way home, we witnesed a dog being hit by a car. I got to stop and hold the baby until she died a few minutes later. my heart is heavy now. she was beautiful in spirit and I got to take in her spirit as she passed. what does it mean? does anyone know? happy and sad all at the same time.” My response – “Sounds like you live a spiritually aware life.” If you’re not sad, depressed or scared (sometimes all three at the same time) on occasion, you’re missing something.  You’ve got to...

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The Thanksgiving List

Nov 24, 2011 by

The Thanksgiving List …and don’t forget the real whipping cream for the pie…;) Thanksgiving is my very favorite holiday, and not only because of the turkey and cranberry sandwiches at midnight.  Properly observed, the holiday is all about friends, family and being grateful for all you’ve had and have. Every year I sit down and make a list. Some years it’s longer than others, but it could still go on for pages. It’s amazing how much I have, even when the bank account could be larger and my hips smaller. (Hmmm…maybe I should cut back on that whipping cream…) Here are the top three from my grateful list this year: I’m grateful for the perspective of age. My heart’s been broken more than once. Loved ones die.  And, I don’t believe you ever “get...

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White Trash ‘Toonis

Oct 7, 2011 by

Recently a friend was coming over for Friday martinis. (Everyone knows they can invite themselves over pretty much any Friday. There will be ‘toonis.) I decided to do something a little different so I got out my smaller Kerr jars and made individual drinks. Fun to look at; easy to make. You simply pour vodka over ice (and if you simply must, add a drop or three of dry vermouth). Screw on the lid, shake vigorously. Then, keep in freezer until company arrives. To serve, thread a fresh cherry tomato, a pickled okra pod and a pickled green tomato on a cocktail pick. Wrap a paper towel around the base of the jar with a rubber band, for that extra special touch. On the side, you can offer pimento cheese on saltines (Hey, if...

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