Five reasons I want a husband (or at least a partner)...

Sep 7, 2011 by

It takes all kinds to make the world go round, or so they say.  Girlfriends don’t always agree and as much as many of the women writing for this site are avowedly single, I want a partner again. Partnered relationships aren’t for everyone.  They take a lot of energy, they require compromise and sometimes a commitment beyond what seems reasonable.  Just look at the biblical Sarah, a woman married to a man whose search for meaning brought her a pregnancy at age 90!  She laughed when she heard this prediction, just as I would have laughed if told what my marriage would help me grow into by midlife. Thus, I respectfully submit to the Girlfriends my list of what I have learned about long term relationships. A stable relationship frees my energy How do...

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The Expense of Joy

Aug 8, 2011 by

There ought to be some joy in all this. Dating in middle adulthood is all confusion.  Everyone I meet has been wounded, one way or another.  The formerly married endured divorce, the never married endured someone who left or whom they had to leave.  Everyone fears vulnerability.  They question whether the benefits of partnership are worth the potential expense. I’m not saying dating in young adulthood is any kind of picnic by comparison.  I remember it as an anxious, stressful endeavor; the part of my life that causes me to say things like, “Every boyfriend I ever had, except for my late husband, made me miserable”.  I did, in fact, marry Dave because he didn’t drive me crazy.  He made me calmer.  I saw this when I picked up a journal I’d written in...

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Is Marriage Passe’ ?

Apr 21, 2011 by

“When are you guys finally getting married?” That’s a favorite opening line for family and friends, lately. Tom, my significant other, and I have been together a long time now. We became engaged shortly after meeting – both of us were very sure of the relationship and having the ‘ring’ to prove we were serious, just seemed natural. Over time, folks began to give us that squinty-eyed look that said they were suspicious of this living together thing – without the benefit of ‘marriage’ (you know who you are!) The squintiest looks (no, that’s not a word, I made it up) come from folks over 50. They’re of a certain age, they grew up in the previous century and are sure that living together isn’t merely sinful, it’s wrong. Sinful, you understand, is more...

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All You Need Is A Little Love

Feb 14, 2011 by

Launching All The Single Girlfriends on Valentine’s Day somehow seems appropriate and a bit ironic. Valentine Day’s love is so often equated with “romantic love.”  However, love takes many forms. I was curious to know “what love means” to our Girlfriend Authors. Here’s what they had to say about love .. “Love” – it has meant so many different things as I’ve changed. For example, pre-feminist movement, as a Baby Boomer, “love” meant romance that would involve a ring and marriage. When that happened, I knew that “love” didn’t really mean that for me. I ran from that whole enchilada. Now that I have finally connected the dots on who I am – I will collecting Social Security soon – “love” means the ability to understand and live with myself. Madonna sang about it...

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