Home Alone On A Saturday Night

Doing Exactly What You Want!

Feb 18, 2011 by Rebecca Crichton

Hello there! If you are new here, you might want to subscribe to the RSS feed for updates on this topic.

I’ve been officially single since 1974. Separate from several ‘long-term’ relationships never lasting longer than 5 years, and only one that included a live-in partner for less than a year, I have managed my life as a single woman with serious attention to the elements that make it work.

‘Variety in Balance’ is a mantra of sorts for me. My astrologer friend gives her equivalent of a “Duh” nod, knowing that my Libra Sun Sign, my Enneagram point as a 7 and my Myers-Briggs personality type as ENFP, indicate a high need for interaction and stimulus.

Thus the importance of the unspoken rule: “Always have plans for Saturday night.” Plans mean other people and leaving the house, although I also invite people to my house for dinner and an evening of good talk and maybe a movie from my Netflix Instant Queue.

Occasionally those plans could be about deciding to stay home with a good movie to watch, new music to listen to, a desired book to read, or whatever other activity makes me feel cared for. But I admit that is not my default preference.

What I try to avoid is suddenly finding that my plans for Saturday night are changed due to sickness or another impediment on the part of whoever I was planning to be with.

It happened last week and I felt an old sense of panic which reminded me of being in high school and worrying that I wasn’t popular if I wasn’t busy on Saturdays. It may be that “Everybody Loves Saturday Night, ” but that’s true only if Saturday night carries the special anticipation of friends, activity, something that makes it different from other nights.

I briefly think about how being a part of a couple basically takes care of that concern. There is always someone there to stay home or go out with. While that seems like an appealing idea for a brief moment, I realize how much I like having my life to myself and my plans or lack of them to work out on my own.

However, being with the same person all the time doesn’t manage the variety or the balance part of my rules for happy singleness. I have a relatively wide circle of friends who I make plans with, including couples. I enjoy being with them and rarely wish the same situation for myself.

Because, to be honest, one of the best parts of having plans for Saturday night is coming home, going through my night-time rituals and climbing into bed with the pile of books and magazines by my side. There is always a novel in progress – right now it’s Olive Kittredge by Elizabeth Strout, a non-fiction book – Positivity by Barbara Frederickson and recent editions of the New Yorker, the New York Times Magazine and either Shambala Sun or Spirituality and Health. I alternate chapters from the books with articles in the magazines and feel totally happy.

I won’t even share my bed with Zen, my hugging cat, despite his plaintive pleas. For me, the perfect Saturday night ends alone, reading and contemplating how nice it will be to sleep in on Sunday.

About the Author

Rebecca Crichton Has Written 40 Articles For Us!

I try to stay aware of one main concept: We see things through different lenses. We get caught in our own belief systems and most of us are pretty attached to being right. I am one of those inveterate Life Long Learners. I like new ideas, new experiences, new people, new challenges.

Getting The Latest Tweet...