Mary Schmidt

Society is beginning to realize something us long-time, extremely single people have known all along. It’s fun to be single. And, I’m not talking single bars and all-night parties.  Although I do admit, I had a really, really, really  good time in my younger days. I could never run for public office. ‘nuf said. Thank […]

I had a post almost finished.  All about how for (less than) 40 cents a day you could help save at least a small part of the world.  Our big “ask” for our readers (and my fellow atsgfers) to step up and help us help others.  But…you’ve heard it all before, haven’t you?  If not […]

Some quick math for the ATSGF Adopt-A-Village project: $12/month X 12 divided by 365 = 39.5 cents Over the past – um – three decades or so, I’ve blown a lot of money, on good things and bad. When working in corporate America, I tried to buy my way to happiness($65 for a make-up brush? […]

Following on my post from last week, We ALL Need A Village. Tedious. Overwhelming. Numbing.   And oh-so-terribly depressing…However, we have to start somewhere…or there’ll be no “where” to save one of these days. That’s why I’m working on the Adopt A Village project with Global Hope Network International. Yeah. You’ve heard it all before, all […]

…Virtual, real, or some combination thereof.  We extremely single women have “villages” of friends who may or may not live close, but are always there for us when needed.  These villages become even more important as we age. (I LOVE living alone, but what happens if I fall and really can’t get up? No joke […]

“If you’re afraid of butter, use cream.” ― Julia Child I know Ms. Deen is more than capable of taking care of herself (She told Anthony Bourdain to “get a life.”) Excellent response to his attention-seeking taunts about her dangerous irresponsibility and “disgusting” food. Like he NEVER cooked with butter?  Or ate something that looked totally […]

“We’ll be having prime rib; if you don’t want to eat that, there’ll be salad and stuff…since there’ll only be two of you who don’t eat meat.” – a friend inviting me to a New Year’s feast. Oh! Boy! I could hardly wait to go feast on “salad and stuff.” This week’s lead article in […]

Gail Rubin decided to write a book.  And, it wasn’t just any book.  It was about death.  How to plan for it, deal with it, and – most importantly – think about it.  When we met for coffee, she started by saying, “Talking (thinking) about death won’t kill you, just as talking about sex won’t […]

I love old, retro authentic “stuff.” Rusted boxes? Ancient baskets? Yep, love ‘em (in moderation, I should note). One of my favorite garage sale finds wass a circuit breaker box with a fine “patina” (read rust) – polished up beautifully.  A friend found my truly vintage (company has been defunct for decades) steel and brass […]

Recently a friend posted this on her Facebook status: “this week has been incredible so far as ups and downs emotionally. tonight, my husband took me to Lancaster for an incredible dinner and conversation. it was marvelous. on the way home, we witnesed a dog being hit by a car. I got to stop and […]

The Thanksgiving List …and don’t forget the real whipping cream for the pie…;) Thanksgiving is my very favorite holiday, and not only because of the turkey and cranberry sandwiches at midnight.  Properly observed, the holiday is all about friends, family and being grateful for all you’ve had and have. Every year I sit down and […]

Recently a friend was coming over for Friday martinis. (Everyone knows they can invite themselves over pretty much any Friday. There will be ‘toonis.) I decided to do something a little different so I got out my smaller Kerr jars and made individual drinks. Fun to look at; easy to make. You simply pour vodka […]

Some believe this means being boring. Staid. No fun. All responsibility and no spontaneity. Au Contraire.  Of course this is just my perspective, but… Being a (single) grown-up means: You can decide when it’s time to act silly…and enjoy doing so…without worrying about what others think. You can designate one day a week as the […]

I recently moved my mom, aka “The Momster” to Albuquerque.  As such things go, I couldn’t move most of her material possessions. Too much stuff. Too little time.  Too many and higher priorities. And, as I spent hours digging through drawers, closets and cabinets…much of it appeared to not have been touched, much less used […]

Friends and regular readers of my writing here and at Lipsticking know that I’m going through some major adjustments with my mother.  Fiercely independent. Unwilling to ask for help. Unwilling to accept help. Well, that explains me…but it also explains why my mom ended up where she is…in an assisted living home here in Albuquerque, […]

Yep, that’s what I said. Southern fried rice. I also do “clean out the fridge” rice…or “what do I have in the freezer and pantry” rice…;-)  Basically, work with you’ve got. Get creative, or not. As long as you have garlic and onions in the mix, it’ll be tasty. …and I’d love to try this […]

Sure, we’re all fun and fab and over 40 (or 50, or 60).  But, age isn’t just a number.  It’s a reality, and our bodies have their own agenda, even with the best of care. As difficult as it may be for independent women, we also have to realize we need help on occasion, especially […]

(No, Not Because There Aren’t Any Men) Sure, as I get older, the available pool of men gets smaller.  But, even if they’re available – would I want them?  Would they want me?  By this time, we’ve all got lives and baggage; it’s difficult to make a space for someone else.  Many men wouldn’t be interested in […]

Honey, where’s the Miracle Whip cookbook? Does the headline make you think of home brew with saltines and vienna sausages?  You may also wonder if I’ve been watching too much Justified. Nahhhh. No such thing as too much Justified. I’d buy those godawful sausage things for Raylan Givens and serve ‘em up with a smile.  […]

I enjoy flea markets. I love fleaing.  Ur, no, no – not fleeing. We’re not talking about dating when you’re 50+ today.  Or, maybe we are.  The quality rankings of fleaing could apply to dating.  But then we humans can make pretty much anything (Hey! Quantum physics!) apply to our mating rituals.  But I digress.  […]

As M.F.K. Fisher said, in her introduction to The Art of Eating, “Let Thackeray provide our text: ‘Next to eating good dinners, a healthy man with a benevolent turn of mind, must like, I think, to read about them.’” She goes on to add, “I have been addicted to eating for half a century and […]

Humor is also a way of saying something serious. – T. S. Eliot I love to laugh; I love to make others laugh.  However, this sometimes gets me into trouble, since I can be perceived as “not taking ‘it’ (whatever ‘it’ is) seriously. But, at the age of 50+, I’ve been around the block, run […]

Sometimes it’s better the next day…other times not. Sometimes it’s worse (and how’s that for a cheery “be your best self” affirmation? 😉 There seems to be a universal law re trying new recipes.  The more you make of something, the more likely you’ll hate it – and when you live alone, that’s a LOT […]

Come to think of it, I don’t need thou.  Give me a tomato, a garlic clove, a bit of oil or butter and some pasta – and I’ve got a tasty, from scratch dinner done in no time.  (One of my deep, dark secrets is that I can eat an obscene amount of s‘ghetti. Really.  […]

And I’ve tried…and tried…and tried.  I’ve finally had the startling epiphany (after attempt #48 or so) that I’ll never have her hair – because I don’t have her head (including that gorgeous 53-year-old happy kitten face). Well, duh, Mary. How often have even the most independent, self-confident of us tried to look like or be […]

The short, snarky answer is because it’s a (often mean-spirited, ugly) joke.  Of course, it can also be fun, in very small doses. The Women’s Style section of the NYT gets about a five-minute flip-through before it heads for my recycling bin.  While it can be interesting from a sociological viewpoint, and there are occasionally […]