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And Now A Word From The Fashion Police ... - All The Single Girlfriends

And Now A Word From The Fashion Police …

Summer Fashion Snark

Apr 2, 2012 by

Spring has come early to Boston! Actually it was more like summer last week with temperatures above 80. With this gift from Mother Nature came the flip side of a warm day…fashion faux pas everywhere I looked.

I am by no means a style expert, some of my favorite outfits are too old to even admit! No one has ever mistaken me for a fashion expert BUT some things must obviously be pointed out because it seems many people this week went out without the benefit of common sense…or a mirror!

For  Girlfriends …

Just because the belly shirt is your size doesn’t mean everyone should wear one. If your belly sticks out further than your breasts…cover it up! If your belly covers your waistband when you stand up( or for that matter if you’re seated) wear a full length shirt.

If you have pronounced, protruding vericose veins…NO short shorts. When you decide to wear shorts, please decide to shave your legs-all the way up.
Never should knee highs be worn with shorts. This is always a fashion don’t!

If back fat is a problem, a tiny spaghetti strap shirt is a bad look. This also applies to bat wing flab. That is why God, and all the best designers, invented sleeves .. it has a lot to do with jiggly arms.

If you like the Carrie Bradshaw look with visible bras and bra straps… remember to leave the old ratty gray ones in the drawer til winter comes around again.

Overalls are a great look…for farmers.

Camel toes belong on a camel…a quick look in the mirror will tell you this does not look stylish. And if you lack a mirror, a friend should not let you leave the house.

When you think it’s time to break out those cute stappy little sandals, remember to book an immediate pedicure. Winter feet NEED attention before they see the sun.

Orangy self tanners are not attractive.

Those oh so trendy gauzy floral skirts look great on a certain size…on others they look like drapes. Only Carol Burnett gets away with wearing drapes! Or Scarlet O’Hara. 

Pig tails and “side ponys” look adorable on children and teens…after a “certain” age they are really just kind of desperate.

And For The Men In Our Lives …

Pull your pants up! No one needs to know if you are a briefs or boxer kind of man while walking down the street.

If you have “man boobs” a wife beater is NOT a good look. That also applies to neck to wrist tattoos, cover them up.

Crude T-shirts are not  sexy.

If your old cutoff jeans are so frayed that others can see your undies…cut up a new pair

As mentioned above, overalls are a great look for farmers.

If your belly hangs out of the bottom of your Tshirt…it’s too small! Go shopping for the next size up.

Pastel pants are a great summer look for SOME men. Others look ridiculous. Make sure you have an honest friend who can tell the difference.

Men can wear sandals. Well some men and some sandals. Nasty yellowed overlong toenails are just…nasty. Break down, embrace your inner metrosexual and get a pedicure.

NEVER should socks be worn with sandals!

Most men do not look good with long stringy hair-especially if they are shall we say a little “thin” on top. You don’t look cool.

A bandanna is a great look-if you are in a rock band or robbing a train!

I’m sure everyone has their own list of pet peeves about fashion nightmares. Hopefully when you see me I’m not committing one of those mistakes!

About the Author

Polli Graham Has Written 19 Articles For Us!

I am by education an RN, have worked the majority of my career in ICUs. A few years ago I traded in my scrubs for lady clothes and a briefcase and now I am a liaison for group of excellent Rehabilitaion Hospitals here in Massachusetts. I get to travel around talking with people all day, do some direct marketing and education, and use skills honed over thirty years. In my real life I am a sister, an aunt a daughter and a friend. I have wonderful nieces and nephews who I can play with, travel with, be proud of and spoil! I’ve saved pictures of all our adventures so that someday I can blackmail them into taking me to Early Bird specials.
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