Girlfriends Helping Girlfriends

Interview With Yvonne DiVita

Nov 14, 2011 by

Girlfriends Helping Girlfriends shines a virtual spotlight on amazing women who have been supporting women and girls over a period of time. This interview is extra special for us .. Yvonne DiVita is one of our own Gf Authors.

Yvonne DiVita founder of the Lipsticking one of the longest sustained and most successful digital communities for women.

atsGf/Toby:  What is your favorite quote?

Yvonne DiVita:  From Harriet Beecher Stowe: Women are the real architects of society.

atsGf/Toby:  Who are you beyond your professional resume?

Yvonne DiVita: I’m just a Mom and Grandma, to some “hooman” kids and some “fur” kids. I love reading and writing and watching HGTV. I dream of someday having my own big log cabin where my ‘kids’ can run around free, indoors and out.

atsFg/Toby: What is your favorite “Girlfriend” activity?

Yvonne DiVita: Shopping! But, of course! And, then lunch or dinner where we can tell stories.

atsGf/Toby: Through Lipsticking, one of the oldest sustained blogs for women, you help many Girlfriends and you inspired many women (me included!). Among the women who you’ve met through your blog who has inspired you and how?

Yvonne DiVita: A lot of women inspire me. You and many of the Girlfriends. I am especially inspired by women who survive struggles and make something more of their life, than they thought they could. A lot of Lipsticking’s readers are among them.  My Mom is one. She was a mover and shaker in the mid-20th century when women were supposed to be ‘seen’ and not ‘heard.’

My daughters inspire me, now. I am amazed at the wonderful things they’re doing. My youngest is a new Mom. But, she works and goes to school, also. My eldest has been in business for herself for many years and recently came over to work with me in BlogPaws, my online pet community. Both girls are strong, dedicated, and family-focused. I’m so proud to be their Mom.

atsGf/Toby:  When women reach 40, we  enter  what should be an exciting next chapter in our lives. However, often younger people, frequently men and advertisers, begin to pull a curtain around us and we become invisible. We’re still as vibrant, savvy, sexy as we were the day before. ..  sometimes even more so!  However, too often we buy into it. How do you not be “invisible?”

Yvonne DiVita:

Well, first of all, 40 is a number not a death sentence.

Women need to stop worrying about the number and concentrate on their vitality. We need to show the world we have power and are as exciting as ever! One way I keep from being invisible is by hanging out with other women who are very visible – women who are confident and have strong personalities; women who shake up the status quo every day. I also find myself surrounded by younger women who appreciate the knowledge and expertise of a woman a little ‘older.’

Honestly – I felt more invisible when I was a stay-at-home Mom twenty years ago.  While the marketers were hot on our trail for our ‘buying’ power, no one else gave us the time of day. We were thought to be less intelligent than our ‘working women’ friends and for the most part, the world thought we weren’t able to talk about anything but kids and housework.

atsGf/Toby:  Sometimes when you color outside of the lines you find great success. Sometimes you skin your knee.  Please tell us about a time when you went outside your comfort zone and the lessons that you learned.

Yvonne DiVita: This story is relevant to the previous question. At one point as a stay-at-home Mom, I decided to stick up for women at home so I wrote an editorial letter about how smart and talented we were and that being treated as ‘invisible beings’ at company events with our husbands, in voting booths (wives, of course, always voted the way their husbands told them to!), even at holiday parties, was an injustice. I mentioned the idea of being invisible – and that a great resource was being untapped when women like us were ignored by the media, press, businesses and more.

Wow… the backlash from MY friends who were stay-at-home Moms told me I was totally off base. They said they LIKED being at home and didn’t feel left out at all! They were proud of being homemakers and had no aspirations beyond working in their kids’ schools, when all the kids were finally out of the house all day. Needless to say, I was shocked! I aspired to a higher level of engagement with my fellow human beings. These women were delighted to be in the background, supporting husbands and kids, with no recognition beyond that. They felt I was being … wait for it… “uppity.” So be it. I have gone on to excel in business… as far as I know, they are still all housewives. And happy. I say good for them. But, I also believe a LOT of women want more than that. Not to diminish Motherhood and being a wife – it’s a great gig, for awhile. At some point, it becomes time to move on.

atsGf/Toby:  To wrap this up .. the virtual floor is all yours. What would you tell our community of amazing women?

Yvonne DiVita: I would say hold your head up high. Be proud of yourself. Let your star shine through a little every day. Keep it polished – tap into your inner sanctum to remember how great you are. Look in the mirror and tell that girlfriend how much better the world is with her in it. If you feel a bit down, call a girlfriend.

We’re in this together – there is no power in the world stronger than a dedicated group of women intent on achieving something great.

Continue the conversation with Yvonne!

Website: WME Books

Blog: Lipsticking

Twitter: @lipsticking

Facebook: Lipsticking

About the Author

Girl Friends Has Written 19 Articles For Us!

All The Single Girlfriends is a social content destination for single girlfriends over 40 who are meeting life with style and denial! Each of us, along with you, brings a unique idea of what it means to be single after the big 4-0 birthday. There is not one right way to do that. However, we double dare anyone to deny that women over 40 are not fun and fabulous!
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  1. Debra Pearlman

    Yvonne, thanks for sharing a bit of your story and reminding me to keep the faith. I’m not a mom, but most of my stay-at-home mom friends feel the way you did/do. Wanting to be visible does not mean you are unsupportive of your family, in fact, I’d think it makes you that much more of a role model. Thanks Gf

  2. How wonderful to see Yvonne featured!

    I had the pleasure of her entering my life over a year ago. I admire her and all that she has accomplished more than I could ever find the words to convey.

    She has been an amazing mentor and friend, I am honored to have her as my friend and thank her every day for seeing more in me than I see in myself!

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