The Royal Wedding Fairytale

Apr 29, 2011 by

When we first discussed the idea of an All the Single Girlfriends post regarding the upcoming wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton not surprisingly there was a diversity of opinions amongst the Girlfriends regarding the Royal to-do ranging from yawns to disgust, and everything in between. This is not all that different from the rest of the planet except that in my observation of  the media coverage of the event, the Official Royal version appears to be speaking the loudest. According to a recent New York Times/CBS News poll just 28% of Americans are under the Royal Wedding spell but as Kathryn Shattuck notes in the New York Times, the other 72% of us might plan on Netflix streaming for home entertainment on April 29th. ABC News (yes, ABS News) is apparently not only...

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Royal Weddings: The Agony And The Ecstasy...

Apr 29, 2011 by

Royal weddings can be for the single woman what Christmas tends to be for everyone: The agony and the ecstasy. The magic is being played out on the small screen of a young golden couple who found each other, adjusted to each other, and made it to the day when they would commit themselves to each other for life.  We watch and wonder how come we couldn’t pull that off. We couldn’t even manage the feat with a commoner. Of course the old chip on the shoulder returns that we weren’t born to the noble class.  Had I been, heck, I could have had a shot at my special day being gawked at by millions around the world.  The times I had been engaged, relatives on both sides would have had to have a...

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Kate In The Royal Spot Light

Apr 29, 2011 by

There has been more than the fair share of chatter about the impending nuptials of the young prince William and his fair Kate. Not just simply because of the fact that it is a ‘royal’ wedding, but because he is marrying a commoner, Kate Middleton. Remember the tales of a young Diana, born into an old aristocratic English family with royal ancestry, she was so far from common, the mere sight of her through throngs of crowds into an uproar. She was scrutinized before, during, and after her marriage to Charles – their marriage ended in August 1996. She struggled with her weight, postpartum depression, bulimia, the deaths of dear friends like Gianni Versace, and raising her children in a very almost blinding public spotlight. Her wedding was merely televised. And at a time...

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All The Single Girlfriends Back Story...

Apr 28, 2011 by

February 14, 2011 Dear Girlfriends, Welcome to All The Single Girlfriends! atsGf is a social content destination created especially for women 40+ who approach the world with attitude and style. It just happens that at this point in our lives, we may do it without a life partner or we may not be in a traditional committed relationship. At its heart All The Single Girlfriends is “real” women the sharing stories of their lives with “real” girlfriends .. talking about things girlfriends talk about. Back Story – I thought it would be fun to find a place in the digital world where I could hang out with other women who had similar life experiences. So I searched and searched and searched some more. What I discovered were sites for women of all ages, sites...

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Spontaneous Cattle Herding

Apr 27, 2011 by

This week, I did pull ups and push presses.  I did heavy overhead squats and yoga that left my shirt damp.  Let this information establish my credibility as a person who can do hard physical work.  And then let me tell you that four hours of farm work wore me out! I now view farmers with increased admiration.  They are agricultural superheroes, able to plant 20,000 onions by hand and convince a bull to go back into his pasture with no tool more protective than a sweatshirt, all in one afternoon! The story behind that last one goes like this… A group of about 14 of us planted onions at Venetucci Farm one morning.  Another volunteer and I hung around to plant leeks in the afternoon.  We were organizing to head up the hill...

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Invisible

Apr 26, 2011 by

“Old age takes everyone by surprise, and no one really ever comes to terms with it.” That’s what Jill Lepore writes in THE NEW YORKER’s March 14th article on aging “Twilight.” Lepore is referring to the thinking of G. Stanley Hall.  Ahead of his time, Hall was looking at aging from all kinds of angles in the early 20th century.  Back then, aging was still a novelty. Most people didn’t live long enough to experience it. Today, as the first wave of the 76 million Baby Boomers hits 65 years old, aging has become embedded in society.  Of course, as Hall observed, it does take us by surprise.  Since most of my dysfunctional family dies young, I never anticipated being around much after 50.  Yet, here I am.  And unlike what Hall says, many...

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Five Reasons I Don’t Date

Apr 25, 2011 by

(No, Not Because There Aren’t Any Men) Sure, as I get older, the available pool of men gets smaller.  But, even if they’re available – would I want them?  Would they want me?  By this time, we’ve all got lives and baggage; it’s difficult to make a space for someone else.  Many men wouldn’t be interested in me, for reasons you can infer from the following five reasons I don’t date. 1.  That Deadly “Story Of My Life” First Date.  Hey, I love me; I’m my very favorite person.  I can navel gaze with the best of ‘em.  But after – oh – 25 years or so I’m sick of talking about my hometown, what my parents did, where I went to college, my favorite authors, my hobbies, etc. etc.  Why not just hand him a...

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Passover – The Exodus, Again And Again...

Apr 22, 2011 by

It’s that time of year again for Jews. The challenge of confronting what Passover means to each of us. For observant people, and in this case I am thinking about the women in particular, it entails engaging with the many requirements related to purifying our environment and freeing it from ‘chametz,’ which for most people means things with yeast in them or any of the five species of grain:  wheat, spelt, oats, barley, and rye. Just think of it as Spring Cleaning on steroids. My grandmother did it all: rid all her shelves of offending products, changed her 2 sets of Kosher dishes for 2 different sets of kosher Passover dishes. Her house, which was already immaculate, became even more pristine for the holiday. My grandfather observed the night-before Passover ritual of going through...

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I Hate Running

Apr 22, 2011 by

I hate running.  I really, really hate running.  In spite of my white hot dislike for running, I feel compelled to keep trying it and continue to register for races.  I have heard that quote about the definition of insanity, something like “The definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing over and over, while expecting different results.” That perfectly describes my relationship with running.  I keep trying it, hoping that one day I will actually enjoy it, but I never do. There are certain things about running that I don’t hate.  For example, when I am running on a regular basis, I can eat like a horse with a tapeworm and not gain weight and that is indescribably wonderful, but that doesn’t mean I love running. It means I love food...

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Is Marriage Passe’ ?

Apr 21, 2011 by

“When are you guys finally getting married?” That’s a favorite opening line for family and friends, lately. Tom, my significant other, and I have been together a long time now. We became engaged shortly after meeting – both of us were very sure of the relationship and having the ‘ring’ to prove we were serious, just seemed natural. Over time, folks began to give us that squinty-eyed look that said they were suspicious of this living together thing – without the benefit of ‘marriage’ (you know who you are!) The squintiest looks (no, that’s not a word, I made it up) come from folks over 50. They’re of a certain age, they grew up in the previous century and are sure that living together isn’t merely sinful, it’s wrong. Sinful, you understand, is more...

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Living a Dangerous Life

Apr 20, 2011 by

Everyone knows it’s dangerous to, say, ride a motorcycle or eat saturated fat, but somehow we miss the inherent danger of being alive. My husband died of acute leukemia.  In June of 2008, we were living ordinary lives.  In July, I took Dave to the doctor for what we thought was diverticulitis, common to 45 year old men and easy to cure.  In August, he was trapped in the hospital on chemotherapy and by the end of September, he was gone.  The whole hospital episode, from diagnosis to death, took six weeks. Is it any wonder it seems to me that we barely control anything in our lives?  Trouble will find you, even if you’re perfectly still.  What kind of world is this?  The raw truth is that it’s a world where the person...

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Did We Become Nuns, After All?

Apr 19, 2011 by

It was part of the whole enchilada of growing up Roman Catholic and female in the 1950s: The longing to become a nun. Nuns, who were our teachers, were brides of Christ.  You didn’t have to be genius to figure out that meant they were without the angst of the groom returning home drunk.  They were educated, something most of our own mothers weren’t. And they didn’t fear getting pregnant, over and over again.  Come on, that looked good, compared to where we considered we were likely heading.  Most of us didn’t shake that neatly packaged fantasy until we went boy crazy in the eighth grade. Not for years would any of us ever admit wanting to be a nun. After all, it wasn’t necessary in order to escape our female destiny.  The pill...

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